Category: Notes

I tend to plow through self help books, like my daughter just did with the 16 volume Roald Dahl box set over a week.

I read this over the holidays and I think this will likely be one of the most important books I’ve read in a while. So I’m following up the library copy with a purchase on Amazon.

We just tried his Focus Mapping technique with how to teach her Chinese and in twenty minutes it yielded some key insights in what wasn’t working. My wife still found it painful (she finds all such exercises difficult) but I think it was quite valuable.

After having gone through one of his “full” processes (in all a half hour of time), I tend to agree with his assertion that you can start habits at any time. There is no need to wait for a new year’s resolution. Just notice a problem, take a moment to look at it systematically, and start implementing a change.

Normally I try to write up some (slightly) deeper thoughts or anecdotes to go in my initial impressions. I also usually let these notes marinate for a while before publishing.

This one is just go, go, go.

Strongly Recommended.

I stumbled across this book in my garage the week after Tony passed away. It seemed fitting to reread my former client’s book so I brought it in.

It put me in a pretty deep funk for a few days.

Tony had a great story and rich ideas about company culture, and it was depressing to remind myself of what we lost after he was cursed with unimaginable wealth.

It is clear that Tony thought he had a core belief system at the time he wrote the book. The words he wrote still resonate. They evolution of his ideas are insightful and his suggestions still worth exploring for shaping an organization.

However, the removal of all limitations must be one of the most destabilizing things in one’s life. From his story, it seems that he barely survived (financially) from his first big success. Tony seemed to be a guy who enjoy pushing things to the edge, and the continued growth of Zappos and making more cash were paltry goals for his next phase in life. My guess is that he had hoped revitalizing the East Fremont district would be his next big challenge, but city building is an agonizingly slow process.

As the benefactor of all those around him, he cursed himself with the company of yes-men, and he lost one of the most valuable gifts of this world, “No.” Without limitations, how can one even start to make a decision? And so he thrashed around looking for self actualization, finding tragedy instead.

But his book remains. The story of Zappos will remain a company of legend, and his thoughts are well worth contemplating for someone who is building an organization. The story is now tinged with the sadness of the future, but maybe it’s truer that way.

The basic premise of QBQ is quite basic.

How (or What) can I do to actively address this problem?

This concept germinated in the business world, but the Millers did an excellent job applying it to family life.

The main point of this book could be summarized with popular trope of “simple not easy”. Being personally accountable is an simple concept, but it isn’t easy in practice, not in business and definitely not at home. Even though you could personally conceptualize how QBQ would apply to family life after reading one their business books, it is illuminating to hear the stories from the Miller household and their diverse family.

In this crazy year, a lot has happened that is out of our control. Frustration has been overwhelming, passions are overflowing. QBQ won’t insulate you from these turbulent times, but it will remind you to get to work. After having made progress on what you can change, a hidden benefit reveals itself. By regularly asking the QBQ, your mind is better able to let go of the things you can’t control.

Reading this book doesn’t make personal accountability at home any easier, but it is definitely helpful to keep the Millers’ simple lessons top of mind.

This book was provided as a review copy by the author a couple years ago, but this unapologetically positive review is only tempered by a real apology for taking so long to read and review it.

John G. Miller’s first book, QBQ!, was a gem about personal accountability. This second book, another tight little volume, does not disappoint. Even though both books are quite short, they are enhanced by being separate volumes.

John has a clarion message to share with the world, the Question Behind the Question : “how/what can I do to address this problem”.

With such a simple message, the method is equally as simple – ask the QBQ whenever you encounter a problem. Being personally accountable is a binary practice, you either are or you ain’t. It isn’t necessary to bloat a book on the subject.

However, it never hurts to look at such a foundational concept from multiple angles. QBQ! was a collection of short essays that creating a cloud of thoughts and examples around the QBQ. Flipping the Switch is categorized into five key benefits from engaging in this practice: Learning, Ownership, Creativity, Service, and Trust. It also includes a discussion that addresses some of the excuses the author has encountered while evangelizing this message.

The core message is quite simple, so either book is a great starting point. And then feel free to read the other book. By approaching the subject in a separate volume, the author is able to revisit this basic concept with a new lens. Reformatting the message keeps it fresh.

Ultimately, personal accountability is all about execution. The goal is to encourage you to the Question Behind the Question and then take personal accountability to make your life better. How you get to action is somewhat irrelevant. Just pick up a copy and start asking the QBQ.

The author was kind enough to send me a review copy of this book after I had sent him an appreciative email. Unfortunately, I got sidetracked with the arrival of my son and a major job change, so I’m happy to finally complete this pairing a couple years later.

I was first introduced to Raymond Chandler via a used bookstore in Paris while I was studying abroad for a semester. I was so taken that I went out and read everything Raymond Chandler wrote, short stories, novels, essays.

During the pandemic, I thought it was time to revisit the top three highlights of his oeuvre, The Big Sleep, Farewell My Lovely, and the Long Goodbye.

This book was his first novel, however I read it relatively late in that project – I didn’t find a copy of it until after I moved back to the States. I remember enjoying it quite a lot, an impressive first novel that was an explosion of energy, dramatically announcing a new author into the scene.

Unfortunately, the book did not hold up under a second reading. There were a few cringeworthy moments in the novel which I had overlooked in a less politically charged time. The conversation around toxic masculinity certainly affected my read on Marlowe’s character, deflated the sense of pure energy that I experienced in the first reading.

It didn’t help that I was concurrently reading Frederick Frank’s Zen of Seeing, which included multiple critiques of “artifice”. Hardboiled detective fiction is doubly such, layering the mystery genre with an overtly self conscious writing style. I still enjoyed Chandler’s use of wild metaphors, but this bit of bad timing also took some of the fun out of the ride.

Thirteen years is a long time, so I’m curious how the other two novels will hold up. My memory of this book being a easy quick read still held true, so I don’t think it will be a major time investment. It will be interesting to see what my current self thinks of the literary indulgences of me, a quarter of my life ago.

PS: I did not notice this fact in my first read, but The Big Sleep was published right before World War 2. It was an interesting exercise to read it with the awareness that the story was written before the full horrors of the mid-century era had become apparent.