GRIZZLY PEAR

written snapshots

Category: Practices

  • How shall we consider the election today?

    novice reads the I Ching

    19:1,3 to 46

    In reading classic texts, one should be wary of the context. These are invariably Imperial documents. They were written by men in power to influence men with even more power. Literacy was an ultimate privilege.

    Reading them is a balancing act. Books that survived the ages must have provided great value to their readers. But we shouldn’t uncritically marinate in their archaic values.

    Then again, questioning paradigms is the point of divination. This is a tool to help us surface our self-imposed unconsciousness.

    So let’s ask the oracle of ancient kings concerning this day of democracy.

    ~

    19. The Approach 臨
    ䷒ (earth above a lake)
    Success approaches by obtaining the trust of others. Be boundless in teaching. Lead by patient persuasion. Share the truth. But growth may be short-lived, calamity might be around the corner.

    Changing Line 3
    Complacency in the approach will result in stagnation. However, doom is not predestined. Remorse against comfort and vigilance against ignorance will protect from harm.

    46. Pushing Upward 升
    ䷭ (earth above the wood)
    Like a tree pushes upward through the earth, greatness will rise. Rooted in good character and heaping small efforts. This accumulation can climb high. Practice devotion to continual progress.

    ~

    Success is near, so is calamity.
    Don’t get comfortable, continual refinement.
    The constant pressure of little victories leads to great progress.

  • Music, generally

    I grew up in a strictly classical house, but I ended up enjoying an extremely wide variety of music, everything from death metal, to tejano. My tastes run a mile wide and a millimeter deep.

    Out of this sea of noise, I do find myself regularly returning to celtic instrumentals, bluegrass, and Bach’s Goldberg Variations. Though I’ve gotten onto a jazz kick lately.

    Unfortunately, I never sit down to listen to music. Music is utilitarian noise while I do other stuff, Music has been relegated to third place after audiobooks / podcasts (for brainless chores and commutes) or silence (for focused attention).

    Music is for the middle tasks needs a non-distracting background noise to keep my brain from becoming anxious when the work is progressing slowly. Music can lull a mind that is spinning faster than the hand can fly.

    Traditionally, the lullaby has been Electronic Dance Music with driving beat and a simple melody. I’m slightly embarrassed by how much EDM I’ve consumed on youtube, but I’m also perversely proud of this odd quirk, like my occasional interest in the Eurovision song contest.

    I’ve always been too cheap to pay for concert experiences so my musical life has been 99.5% experienced over recorded media. I grok the appeal of the live experience, but for $16 I can get a plastic disc that can replay that sound sequence in perpetuity. It’s a classic 80/20 problem, especially now that it is all free on the interwebs

    In theory I want to learn how to properly appreciate music properly, but what should I delete from my schedule to make room for analyzing different versions of the Goldberg Variations or jazz standards?

    Even if I found time for music appreciation, I’d rather practice a musical instrument to some level of proficiency. Much like my musical tastes, I have a wide variety of instruments that I play at an exceedingly beginner level.

    I played piano for a very short period as a child. I lasted just long enough to learn the elementary basics of reading musical notation.

    In elementary school, I learned the recorder like every other kid. I still have the beige Yamaha recorder from 3rd grade in Mr. Edwards class.

    I played trombone in high school with a disastrous stint as a freshman in the UC Berkeley marching band. Music is too ephemeral for my materialist inclinations. I need a tangible deliverable. When I started architectural studios in the spring semester that year, I found my tribe.

    For quite a while I didn’t play any music, but after finishing undergrad I road tripped through the Southwest. In Albuquerque I met a guy from Alaska who spent the long winters playing the banjo. He pulled it out for a magical night, noodling on the front stoop of the hostel.

    (This was before we all had the internet in our pockets. I wonder if we’ve lost a generation over the last couple decades.)

    After the trip I got my own banjo, but never got any good at it. Just like all the other instruments I didn’t practice diligently. I had a short revival of playing the banjo during grad school, but hit a plateau and stopped.

    A couple years after grad school, I got into blues harmonica for a few months, playing it during lunch in the empty park next to my office (no one is outside during the Houston summer). I got good enough to bend notes, but stalled out and lost interest. I’m still quite fond of the harmonica – where else can you get a professional level instrument for $45?

    About seven years ago, I borrowed my parent’s ukulele which taught me the concept of chords. Playing childrens songs felt like a reasonable goal. I got far enough to buy my own ukulele (a plastic model that is virtually indestructible), but then I came across a book on clawhammer banjo at the library and went back to my old fellow.

    With the clawhammer style, I got good enough to play about five or six songs on the banjo but stopped. (For a while I kept it the corner of the playroom, so I could frail on a whim, but the boy broke with the fifth string a year ago and I haven’t fixed it.)

    Finally, when the boy was born, I suddenly got entranced by the idea of percussion. I first picked up a djembe (what gorgeous bass!), but settled on a darbuka because I enjoyed the asymmetrical position. But again a lack of dedication meant I never internalized any of the standard rhythms. Maybe I can blame COVID because I stopped going to drum circles and haven’t returned.

    I’d like to pick up a cajon to get some snares, but given my two week dalliance with the native american flute last summer (the girl hated the sound), I’m well it would be a frivolous purchase.

    If I was to buckle down and focus, I would think the banjo would be my primary instrument, but who knows when I will prioritize doing musical practice.

    I enjoy my music to be sure. Just not enough to be expert at any level.

    Maybe one day.

  • Old boxes of books

    Once or twice a year, I dig through my fifteen boxes of books in the garage. Aside from the occasional late night web purchase, these are my most materialistic exercises.

    It’s ridiculous that I keep these books.

    The enlightened unattached person should discard all these material goods. Nine years in a box is proof that they are unnecessary.

    However, I love revisiting all these little gifts (burdens?) from my younger self. Books always carry a physical memory of the moment when they were acquired or when they were read.

    Books also carry hope for future knowledge. Mainly a vain hope; I’ve lugged some of these across the continent over two decades, from Berkeley to Houston to Vegas.

    One day, when we find our own house, I envision a big bookshelf with all these books in glorious display. Maybe that’s a vain hope too.

    But for now, I occasionally rescue a select few from the garage. At least those lucky volumes are a step closer to being read.

    Now where can I find time to read?

  • Another year in the books

    We took down the tree yesterday, marking our official end of 2021.

    I had wanted to take it down on the first, but the kids lobbied an extra day, but we got sidetracked on Sunday and it was suddenly bedtime.

    Same for Monday. So I was going to take it down myself that night, but the kids insisted on being part of the process.

    So we took it down on Tuesday morning. I put on the Peanuts Christmas album in the background and we enjoyed our last party of the holiday season, taking down the ornaments, lights, and tree, punctuated by a breakfast halfway in between.

    A mundane event; a punctuation for the passage of time. I’ll get maybe ten more of these with my daughter (if she doesn’t grow out of it before heading off to college).

    2021 was again a strange year, but with the kids growing up fast, I suspect every year will be unique, whatever “normal” we settle into.

    So here’s to the next strange year. Let’s hope we make the most of it.

  • I Ching Links

    Like many other hobbies, I’ve cooled a bit on the I Ching. For a while, I consulted it once a week, but it’s been a while since I last visited the book. Like my bread baking, I will coast on the knowledge I picked up over my first couple of months of diligent practice. Or maybe like the Ukulele, I won’t visit much at all.

    With the honeymoon phase long past, I won’t be finding many more internet resources for the I Ching, so this seemed the appropriate time to compile some key links.

    Biroco – S. J. Marshall’s book reviews were a great introduction to the world of the I Ching in English. I also follow his method for interpreting the changing lines. A comprehensive site, though I suspect that some people might take issue with some of his harsher judgments of various translations. However, I picked up the Wilhelm/Baynes and Lynn translations due to his recommendations and have been pleased with both.

    Hermetica – A lot of good resources, both weblinks and book reviews. He also shares his own translation of the book on this site. His page comparing a multitude of hexagram names is quite interesting to peruse.

    Russell Cottrell – Another site with many reviews with a few virtual divination resources. He also explores a lot of other ideas, including a page comparing 44 translations of #3 and #36, and a nice pocket format I Ching based on the Richmond translation.

    Online Clarity – A nice forum and good community around the I Ching. I’ll occasionally pop into Reddit as well, but prefer the homier feel of this site. I also enjoy Hilary’s email newsletter. She was recently interviewed on youtube which covers quite a bit of ground as an introduction.

    Wikipedia Hexagrams – A concise location of hexagrams and English and Chinese names.

    LiSe – I have not explored this site much, however many people have recommended her site. If I was to start exploring the I Ching again, this would be the next spot to dig into.

    Fred Hatt is a New York artist who has made a good video of divination with yarrow sticks.  It takes a while (a feature of this style of divination), but he chats his way through the process. He was also the guest on this great podcast episode which includes an audio demonstration of divination with coins.


    Finally, I must close with this extended quote from Fred Hatt’s autobiographical blog post.  It has nothing to do with the I Ching, but wish I was as comfortable with myself as Fred is with his path in life, “while I ignore this official Art World, it ignores me back.”

    I rarely write about my own life here on Drawing Life. I avoid drama and so I imagine my life would be pretty boring to anyone not close to me. I devote much of my free time to drawing, photography, and other creative pursuits. While I show work and do events and performances fairly regularly, I’ve always maintained my art as an amateur practice. Of course the word “amateur” means lover, one who does something for the pure love of it. Since I work for a living, I don’t have to worry about creating work to please a market or to make it fit what some critics want to write about. I keep the work free, and I follow it wherever it leads me. To be honest, while I love a lot of living artists and their work, the international contemporary art scene as a whole, with its mega-wealthy collectors and ego-driven art stars, its combination of pretentious discourse and cheap gimmickry, bores me, and while I ignore this official Art World, it ignores me back. I’d rather treat my work as my own exploration of perception and practice. I do want to use it to communicate to a larger audience, but I’m actually more driven by the pleasure of sharing one on one, the special connection that develops between me and my models, the people I sketch portraits of and the people whose bodies I paint, the dancers and performers I collaborate with, and the fans of my work that visit my studio, sit with me on the floor and look through piles of drawings or photographs.

    Fred Hatt
  • Divination

    Growing up conservative Christian, divination carried an illicit edge.

    But a Tarot deck is just a normal deck of cards with a fifth all-trump suit. Still spooky?

    A while back, my daughter and I messed around with a tarot deck to create a variant on War that improves upon the original (the big change was that we evened out the players’ decks after each round; whoever won more cards banked the extras).

    With the Tarot deck in hand, I also played around with a card reading after the kids went to sleep.

    The booklet that came with this deck was very specific. The cups = love, coins = money, etc. Each card had specific effects in its orientation and place within the tableaux.

    Now, this is where the religious folks have it right. This is not good entertainment. Such a practice with specific prompts will put things in the head that don’t need to be there.

    However, that’s not an issue with divination in general.

    I also played with the Decktet, a modern deck designed in 2008. The creator has published suggestions for using his cards for readings with an open interpretive system. Instead of relying upon concrete predictive functions for each card, a Decktet reading creates a network of relationships between the cards. This method is much more suggestive and might be a great way to unearth the unconscious.


    A few months later, I started messing around with the I Ching. Maybe I’ll revisit the Tarot one day, but it’s hard to beat several thousand years of Chinese divination.

  • OPM.05 (Morning Mottos)

    The start of the new school year reminds me of distance learning last year. My daughter’s school posted a video every morning with news and a recitation of the pledge of allegiance.

    This daily practice was a powerful mantra, sinking into my subconscious of a government worker.

    This letter collects mottos from key institutions in my life, starting from the federal government down to mottos I’ve chosen for myself.

    I highly recommend going through such an similar exercise for yourself. It doesn’t take long and it is powerful to regularly contemplate the sayings that were important for our predecessors.

    Thanks for reading. Please subscribe if you’d like the next letter in your inbox.


    A Few Mottos to Start your Mornings

    United States of America


    I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

    United States of America, Pledge of Allegiance


    In God We Trust

    Official Motto of the United States of America


    E pluribus unum

    Front of Great Seal of the United States
    (Out of Many, One)


    Annuit cœptis

    Novus ordo seclorum

    Reverse Side of the Great Seal of the United States
    (Providence favors our undertakings)
    (New order of the ages)

    State of Nevada

    All for Our Country

    State of Nevada, Official Motto
    (Replacing the territorial motto “Volens et Potens”, Willing and Able)

    Battle Born

    State Nickname on our flag
    (Most folks think this is our official Motto)

    “Home” means Nevada, “Home” means the hills,
    “Home” means the sage and the pines.
    Out by the Truckee’s silvery rills,
    Out where the sun always shines,
    There is a land that I love the best,
    Fairer than all I can see.
    Right in the heart of the golden west
    “Home” means Nevada to me.

    Refrain from Home Means Nevada (State song)

    State of Nevada Department of Administration

    Vision
    To provide excellent service.

    Mission
    To serve Nevadans and help our customers by providing efficient and effective solutions.

    Priorities
    Be responsive to customer needs.
    Continually improve leadership and promote teamwork within the Department.
    Support customer goals through innovative solutions and strategies.
    Improve efficiency through continual review, automation, and improved transparency.
    Support agency performance through workforce development.

    (my bold)


    State of Nevada Public Works Division

    Vision
    State agencies will occupy exemplary facilities.

    Mission
    To provide well planned, efficient, and safe facilities to state agencies so they can effectively administer their programs.

    Philosophy
    We work as a team to build consensus, we take pride in our work, and we serve with humility.

    (my bold)

    Other Mottos

    Fiat Lux

    University of California, Berkeley
    (Let there be Light)


    Letters, Science, Art

    Rice University Seal


    Inspire. Create. Innovate.

    Nevada Learning Academy


    齊天大聖

    “Qitian Dasheng”, Sun Wukong’s self adopted nickname
    (“Great Sage Equal to Heaven” is utterly ridiculous but I am fond of it as a reminder to go break eggs when an omlette is necessary)


    盡忠報國

    “Jinzhong Baoguo”, Marshall Yue Fei’s tattoo
    (Utmost Loyalty, Serve the Country)


    Festina Lente

    Italo Calvino’s personal motto, among others
    (Hurry Slowly)

    Personal Mottos

    To tinker and delight, together.

    Personal Mission Statement


    Notes on my production and consumption

    Grizzly Pear tag line


    Prompts to stretch the curious Owner PM.

    OPM Letter tag line

    Mantras are great. Who would disagree with “liberty and justice for all”?

    So why are the pledge and the flag such contentious symbols? Because our aspirations also remind us of our current failures, and partisans have exploited these gaps to create divisive chasms of identity.

    But we shouldn’t abandon a mantra due our shortcomings. Instead, lets use these regular reminders of our shared destination to fuel our efforts in closing the gap between ideal and reality.

    ~

    One Question

    Is there an awesome motto that I’ve missed? If so I’d love to hear it!

    Hit reply and let’s chat!

    ~

    Three Links

    Cal Newport neatly summarizes Quentin Tarantino’s writing routine, which rolls a daily rhythm, eschewing raw frenzy.

    How Mimi Dixon navigated our fraught culture to launch the Colors of the World crayons with Crayola.

    Yumi Janairo Roth has a cheeky installation project with professional sign spinners working Sol Lewitt quotes. It reminds me of the Marquesse Scott video that introduced me to this niche.

    … and a photo.

    “…by the rocket’s red flare…”, Mount Charleston, July 2021

    ~

    Thanks for reading this OPM letter! I’d love to have a conversation if you have any feedback. I hope you found some prompts to stretch your craft and relationships as a curious Owner PM. See you next week!

    Stay humble, be kind, and keep experimenting!
    Justus Pang, RA

  • Memorizing the I Ching Sequence

    Over the past month, I surpassed my expectations with the I Ching by memorizing the non-intuitive “King Wen” sequence of 64 hexagrams, as well as their English and Chinese names.

    The two critical tools for this exercise were my flashcards on Quizlet and on Pleco. (Quizlet is a free website and app. Pleco is a free Chinese dictionary app, but I paid extra for its flashcard functionality years ago.)

    It was unfortunate that Pleco’s flashcards could not render the hexagram unicode characters properly, however this limitation turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Quizlet was great for learning the hexagrams. Switching over to Pleco without the benefit of seeing the hexagram image on the screen almost felt like starting over, but the extra mental effort locked in my memorization. Soon after moving to Pleco, I started visualizing the hexagram sequence in my head, which I suspect was a nice side effect of this difficult limitation. And of course, Pleco was indispensable for learning the Chinese characters for the titles.

    The path I took in learning the sequence was unorthodox. I started by pulling a few hexagrams that had been thrown in recent sessions. I realized that a purely random approach was unworkable so I pulled out all the hexagrams with Thunder below and with Lake above. (I chose these two trigrams because they were most analogous to my old rabbits Badger and Peppercorn.) Then I started to get systematic. The obvious first choice should have been simple doubled up trigrams, so I added them into the mix.

    At that point, I had about thirty hexagrams memorized. I completed the remainder by filling in the gaps in the sequence, starting from the beginning. It was slow going for a bit, but the memorization quickly coalesced at the end. For this last step, it was nice to have previously memorized milestones scattered along the entire sequence. It created a path where the mind could while rest when reciting the sequence in order.

    After memorizing the sequence with English titles and Chinese pronunciations, I decided to learn the written Chinese characters. This last step only took a week. I don’t know much written Chinese, but I suspect my multitude of attempts over the years really greased the skids for the process.

    All in all, it worked. Since the process went faster than expected, I don’t know if there is much value in trying to optimize the process. Just do it.

    This was a good exercise in memorization with the help of modern digital tools. These flashcard programs didn’t make the effort easy, but they certainly made the process less difficult. Whenever I had a short break (or spent an hour in line to get a vaccine shot) I’d pull out the phone and work out my brain.

    The benefits from this effort were immediately noticeable, even before I had memorized much of sequence. I use the slow yarrow stalk method for building the hexagrams, so I have plenty of time to mull the possible results during the process. Knowing the sequence by heart has enriched the divination process since I delight in pondering the forking paths before the final answer reveals itself.

    Outside of the benefits to the I Ching practice, it was good to just go through a pure exercise of raw brute force memorization. The value of memorization diminished considerably in this age of the ubiquitous internet. However, this skill should not be completely discarded, and there is value in practicing focused concentration. The sense of accomplishment felt great, and since the process didn’t take nearly as long as I feared, I will be more willing to deploy this mental tool as the need arises. After all, I was willing to embark on this exercise partly because of the distant memory of learning koine Greek when I was a devout Christian, a quarter century years ago.

    And heck, even if I move onto another obsession in a few months, I now have an interesting sequence for counting sheep, to help me fall back asleep if I wake up too early in the morning.

  • I Ching Flashcards for Pleco

    I was working through my Quizlet flashcards and decided to also learn the Chinese titles, so I made some flashcards on Pleco, the Chinese-English Dictionary App.

    Unfortunately Pleco doesn’t render the hexagrams on iOS, which would have been really slick.

    In the end, I produced two flashcard sets, both exported as txt files.

    This first set includes the King Wen hexagram number, the Trigrams, and Judgement (Gregory Richter translation), as well as the (modern) Dictionary Definition of the words. (If you open it up, you’ll notice an odd character peppered throughout the file – this character is used by Pleco to designate line breaks on the card.)

    The second is just a list of all the Chinese words that was used for these titles. This is intended to tie into the Pleco dictionary and does not include its own definitions. I produced this set because making custom cards by adding I Ching info took out the formatting that made the standard cards more readable.

    Have fun!

  • I Ching, Feb-Mar, 2021

    Notes on my new practice of conducting I Ching readings.

    I started my exploration of I Ching by reading the pocket edition translated by Thomas Cleary. Even though I did not enjoy Cleary’s prose and most of these ancient allusions were utterly impenetrable, reading the basic text without commentary was a great introduction to the structure of the book.

    That said, I did not conduct readings until my copy of the John Minford translation arrived in the mail, which has an extensive commentary to shed light for personal readings. Minford made a quirky choice to toss in a few Latin phrases in the readings, which I find atmospheric (but is certainly a YMMV preference).

    The first readings were sparse because I was asking indeterminate questions. However, I’ve been stumbling into better insight, due to increasing familiarity and learning to ask sharper questions. As with much in life, the most important step for obtaining a useful answer is finding the right question. Hopefully this practice will continue to be more insightful as I improve at this skill.

    None of the answers are earth shattering – I am usually reminded of well trod aphorisms that I’ve said many times – but the applications are sometimes unique and novel. For better or worse, I suspect this practice may be an exercise in self confirmation bias. To be sacrilegious for a moment, the base text of the I Ching is an impenetrable word salad (at least for a beginner), so there is an obvious danger of reading what one wants. One ought to consider the warnings of S. J. Marshall and remember dire lessons of history when someone overly-enthusiastically embrace the ambiguous pronouncements of the Delphic Oracle.

    I jot notes of all my readings in a notebook. If past experience with sketchbooks are an indication, I won’t ever refer these old notes in the future but the most important aspect of writing things down is that it focuses the mind at the moment.

    That said, I did come across an interesting coincidence between a consecutive readings the other day. It’s both easy to dismiss as just chance, but the animal spirit inside of me still wants to put special significance on the moment.

    A week after after starting this ritual, I added two extra steps to each session. After the I Ching reading, I read a section of the Dao De Jing. I’m just marching through it front to back, jotting a couple notes along the way, and I plan on rotating through various books of wisdom (such as the Analects or Art of War) with this practice. Finally, I close with writing down a Chinese proverb from the ABC Dictionary of Chinese Proverbs, (referenced via an addon in Pleco). This last step gives me a chance to write and read a little (non-archaic) Chinese, and I think an earthy aphorism is a necessary benediction after drinking the heady stuff of the other two books.

    The other day, I researched the yarrow stalk method of divination (a much longer process than throwing three-coins six times method). In the process I found out that I had been calculating my coin throwing incorrectly. It was a minor error since overall probabilities were still consistent, but the actual results were “incorrect”. However, I had been getting good insight for the past couple weeks. This early error is a good reminder that divination is a self-conducted mind game. The key is to allow chance put fresh unexpected input into your brain. I suspect you could practice bibliomancy and just flip the book open at random.

    I scoured the backyard for twigs and got 50 sticks and have found that I quite enjoy this method of divination. It is a considerably longer route to getting an answer, but noticeably more pleasurable. It seems that sometimes the answer just comes from spending 20 minutes with the question doing a relatively mindless counting task. And for a guy who is as fidgety as me, this is likely the closest I’ll get to a meditative practice.

    The internet has a habit of transmogrifying a passing interest into the only thing in the world. Everybody’s into it now! I’ve joined the I Ching Reddit as well as the OnlineClarity forums, both of which have users who carry themselves with a discomfiting certainty that I recognize from my teenage years as a Reformed Baptist.

    S. J. Marshall’s excellent Biroco.com and Bradford Hatcher’s Hermetica.info are also quite self assured, but they are both comprehensive resources with recommendations from folks seem who really know what they are talking about. Finding these websites spurred me to record these notes. This is a post is a marker of how I started the practice, since I suspect things may shift under his influence.

    A less dogmatic and much more sympathetic take on the I Ching is this lovely essay by Will Buckingham. I might just pick up his book inspired by the I Ching, as well as Calvino’s Castle of Crossed Destinies (any excuse for a Calvino is a good one).

    With only a couple months, I’ve barely started this practice compared to these illustrious students. I’m still on the fresh, exciting part of the learning curve, where new insights are gleaned every few days. I’m curious when the dip will hit, and whether I will drop this like many of my other dustbin hobbies. Ultimately, that’s a problem for another day. At the moment, my intended next steps are:

    1. Keep up the practice.
    2. Incorporate S. J. Marshall’s method of interpreting changing lines.
    3. Play more with the Yarrow Stalk Method.
    4. Print copies of the Nigel Richardson books for use during readings. Also, get a copy of the Wilhelm-Baynes Translation with its Neo Confucian background and Richard Lynn’s Translation with Wang Bi’s (Neo Taoist) commentary.
    5. Learn to memorize the hexagrams. I’ve been using a set of flashcards that I assembled on Quizlet.
    6. Read Minford, Lynn, and Wilhelm-Baynes cover to cover (separately from the readings).